Hawaii Vacation – A Reflection

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There’s a lot I could say about our Hawaii vacation. That it was so many things to be home. Amazing, heartbreaking, nostalgic, relaxing, invigorating, disappointing, delicious, fun.

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In Hawaii I settle into myself differently than here, or even compared to San Francisco, a place that I consider to be my heart’s home. There’s something about the islands that makes you take it down a notch – makes you not care about wearing the same outfit three days in a row, or not think twice about that second helping of dessert, or not worry about whether you should end an email with “Very Best” or simply, “Best,”.

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Mom’s neighbor’s house. She lives in Kalihi Valley with my aunt and grandma. It’s very lush, which means it’s also very buggy!

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I think Hawaii does that for everyone, tourists and residents alike. But for me there is a “coming home” element to it that somehow takes it to a different level. And it’s not just because my family is here (which of course plays a big part though).

My whole perspective on who I am changes. For example, I can walk into a store and feel comfortable chatting it up with the sales reps (which I do NOT do). Or when I’m with people who’ve known me forever (I went to a high-school reunion while I was there) – it’s all so….easy. To just be. It’s hard to explain.

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Class of ’90 (eek!)

They say Hawaii is full of ancient magic (it is no joke, you guys – the ghost stories I could tell you  – many from the mouths of people who don’t, or who used to not, believe in spirits).

But it’s magical in other ways, too. Its beauty, that I appreciate more and more each time I visit, its ability to make me slow down (even when I don’t want to) and its powerful reminder of where I came from, where my mother came from, where her mother came from and back and back and back.

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Mom with our little girl, making leis from her stephanotis flowers.

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Easter, Hawaiian style.

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My trip was hardly deep or spiritual. We did a lot of beach time, family time, eating, lazing around. The usual vacation stuff. But then, when trying to explain the trip and looking at all the photos and really thinking about what Hawaii means to me. There’s a lot there. And the beauty of it is that it will all still be there when I return. Until we meet again. A hui hou.

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The February List – 2016

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Wow, clearly 2016 is kicking my booty. I feel like I just finished the January List. Which I guess is sort of true as that post was written in mid-February.

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1) We got more snow this month – yay! – but it’s still been a mild winter which means we can actually get out for a walk once in a while. We sometimes pass a tree on the Boulevard that has a container nailed to it. I wasn’t sure what it was until I saw someone pull a dog treat out of it. Now whenever we pass the tree, Sam looks forward to his treat.

2) Another way to score dog treats on walks is via the city garbage collector guys. The garbage is picked up by guys in golf cart-type vehicles, who zip up your driveway, empty garbage into the back of their bins and then drive to a larger truck posted up close by.

On more than one occasion, when I’ve been out with the dog, one of the guys will pull over, get out and give Sam a doggie bone and a pat.

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3) On our walks, I sometimes see lost items displayed on fire hydrants or lamp posts. The fact that people are taking the time to pick up these objects and place them in spots where owners are likely to find them is really touching to me somehow.

4)  The next time your doctor says, “it will only take a second,” beware. During a recent check-up, I asked my doctor about a mark on my shoulder that I thought might be a mole. She said it was a blackhead (eek) and that she would remove it for me. It will only take a second. Which it did. And then I got the $250 bill for “acne surgery.” Not cool.

5)  Farms Market has started selling the only ice cream in the area made with 100% organic, locally-sourced ingredients. Each flavor has about six to seven ingredients and it is to die for.

At $8.99 a pint, it also makes it one of the most expensive ice creams in town. There’s no nutritional information on the label, because why bother? We all know how many calories a scoop of ice cream has. A lot. There’s a sea salt caramel pint in our freezer right now and I cannot stop thinking about it.

6) Speaking of Farms Market, I keep meaning to tell you that I learned my lesson the hard way (like over a year ago) regarding not shopping at the very small and cramped store (they are remodeling, thank goodness) during the high-school lunch hour. Just don’t.

The other day I was driving by the store and was excited that I had escaped the frantic craze of the lunch crowd. No backpacks outside, no kids. All clear. I parked, went inside and one minute later, one of the staff yells, “Second LUUUUNCH!” And they all come rushing in as I try to flatten myself against the condiments.

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7)  Our oldest turned seven this month. I was too lazy to bake a cake this year, so we ordered one from Josefs. She requested a unicorn on her cake and we gave them free reign. So we got this unicorn, circa 1985. She insisted that she get the piece with the horn, since it has magical powers, as we all know. The chocolate frosting tasted somewhat chemically, note to self.

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SKATE (768x1024)8)  One of our friends who has a homemade ice rink in their backyard, invited us over one day to skate. The girls have never skated, nor do they have skates, but serendipity took over and someone happened to have two pairs of skates in exactly the right size.

My husband was out of town and part of me (most of me) didn’t want to go because I was afraid there would be crying and whining and general mayhem. But none of that happened. They were timid, but they both got out there and the older one started getting the hang of it without the net. Such a great first experience!

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8)  I chopped of the leaves of some bok choy and this was what was left of the stalk.

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9)  We finally had dinner in our dining room. I love baby’s breath when it’s solo. It’s so delicate and pretty. I made chicken mirabella and rigatoni with pork/beef ragu.

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10)  Remember the time I asked my dry cleaning lady where I could get good Korean food and she said, “my house”? The cooking classes finally happened! Details in a separate post.

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11)  I have been so bored with my hair lately, so I made an appointment with my stylist, who really is the best person I’ve ever had do my hair. Like ever and I’ve been to about ten fancy stylists in San Francisco.

To get ready for my appointment, I “pinned” all these awesome pictures of shorter hair and cuts with bangs and was almost ready to do the big chop, but when I told my husband my great idea, he said, “Please don’t do that. It’s going to make you be in a bad mood for two months.” Which I considered and realized was true. Soooo…I just had her add some new highlights. Problem averted.

IMG_4507 (809x1024)12)  I’m still on the health train, and with that comes riding the stationary bike in the basement and doing my floor work afterwards like a good girl. This is usually where the dog posts up as he watches me with non-amusement. He’s over it.

We are going to Hawaii for Spring Break this month and I cannot wait. I will take a million photos and post the best ones on the blog. Enjoy the rest of March, everyone!

The Truth About the Band

I’ve been thinking a lot about the band lately. I’ve written about it before, but wanted to dig a little deeper this time.

Flashback to September 2006.

I auditioned for the Gun and Doll Show well after their heyday in the ’90s. I had recently been kicked out as lead singer of Parting Glance, for reasons I’m still unsure of – I didn’t smile enough? I insulted the keyboard player? (he was playing the wrong chord, I swear). I answered an ad on Craigslist and met with Killian, the mastermind behind the Gun and Doll Show (aka GADS), and the rest, as they say, is history. Well, not quite.

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2007. one of my first performances.

The second part of the audition was to perform in an upcoming show at Cafe du Nord on Market Street, so I went to practices, learned all the songs, got my outfits together. Another girl (future bandmate Jennifer) was auditioning at the same time, so although we were friendly to each other, we were both just focused on getting in the band.

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After the performance, Killian sent a group email to us with the subject title, “oh pretty please with a cherry on top, join our band.”
“wow what a great job you both did!, i’ve never done auditions that way before. i think we learned more about each other singing and talking in a room. my favorite thing was watching you work together. not knowing if there is one spot or two. The answer is… we are all hoping you both will fill those spots.”

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He goes on to say we were “born for this band” and that “as you probably gather, a lot of what we are is the brother/sisterhood we feel for each other.” It sounded too good to be true. But it wasn’t.

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photo credit: pj taylor photography

The truth about the band is that it was one of the few times as an adult where I have experienced pure joy. There we were, all of us, stripped down to our most vulnerable selves, doing what we loved the most and it was amazing.

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As I said, Killian was the brains behind the band and he was the perfect frontman – super talented and equally zany. He was forever coming up with a new stunt or costume or song, and there was always an elaborate story behind the “why.” Though we sometimes didn’t understand his vision, we went along with it because we knew we could make it work.

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And he was generous. He paid for the practice space at Secret Studios (in all my other bands, I had to throw down for monthly rent), he didn’t ask the singers to load or unload gear (woo-hoo!) and he usually brought dinner during practice or before a show (although you never knew if it was going to be two sandwiches to share among seven people or four extra-large pizzas). He was passionate and excited and quick to praise. What more could we want in a leader?

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Two and a half years after joining the Gun and Doll Show, I had my first child. Actually, four of us – all three gals and our lead guitarist – became first-time parents within a span of six months.

Having kids threw a little bit of a wrench into our game, but we stayed the course. In fact, four months after giving birth, I was on stage at the American Music Hall, our best performance ever. The sound was fantastic (we could hear the monitors – a miracle!), the crowd was fun and we were all so happy to be playing music together.

In the years following that concert, we continued to play smaller local venues and street fairs. And we did a lot of recording, which is often just as fun as performing.

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Eventually, due to life, I suppose, we sort of just dispersed. One of my last performances (a few months before I became pregnant with my second child and had to go on bed rest) was at the outdoor stage at Wente Vineyards. It was a beautiful summer night. We played to people sitting on blankets as the sun went down. A perfect ending to a perfect chapter in my life.

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backstage

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As I write this, I’m listening to some of the songs we did and I’m blown away at the talent I was surrounded by and what a deep and meaningful experience this turned out to be, all because I answered a Craigslist ad, and because someone (thank you, Kill, I LOVE YOU!) gave me the opportunity.

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Most of my bandmates have gone on to do other musical projects, and I feel like I should be doing the same. I don’t need to be a rockstar (been there, done that. hehe) – there are some things in our lives, like falling in love, that we will never ever be able to replicate or experience again and that’s what makes them so great – but I do need to get off my butt and do something. It’s time.

It might not be as simple as answering an ad on Craigslist, but it could be just as rewarding. As always, I’ll keep you posted.

The December List – 2016

IMG_3666 (768x1024)Yikes! So late with the list. Here’s what happened in December…

1)  I’ve always been a stickler for waiting until the day after Thanksgiving to put Christmas decorations up. I stuck by the rule this year, but barely (I started pulling out boxes before Thanksgiving was over). I’m beginning to understand the strong desire to decorate early. It’s dreary. The flowers are gone, the sun is gone. Let’s get some holiday up in here.

2)  I did break my “no artificial greenery” rule this year and bought three faux garlands. Two for the stairs and one for the living room mantle. Just didn’t want to deal with all the needles and clean-up.

After lots of online research (reviews) and one bad purchase (Home Depot), I settled on garlands from Ballard Designs. magnolia for the stairs (top photo) and angel pine for the mantle (bottom pic). They were pricey, but worth it in the long run. I went back to their website after Christmas to buy another one because I was so impressed with how great they looked, but alas they are sold out of both.

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3)  This photo doesn’t do it justice, but the “crazy house” (girls’ term, not mine) on Lakeshore was ultra decked out for Christmas this year. Whoa.

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4)  I am single-handedly keeping Trader Joe’s pot sticker business alive. Here’s my stash. The TJ’s brand pork ones are the best, followed by the chicken soup dumplings in close second (the Filipino guy who works there – and the only other Filipino I’ve met here – told me to use them in their ginger-miso soup. SO good).

The butternut squash dumplings sound good in theory but they are a disaster. Skip them. You’re welcome.

5)  Speaking of Asian food, I asked my dry cleaning lady if there was anywhere I could get good Korean food. Turns out there is. Her house. Whaaaat? Yes, you guys. She offered to teach me how to cook all my favorite dishes. Date to be decided, and you know I’ll be posting about it.

6)  On the same day Japan’s supreme court ruled to uphold the law that married women must take their husband’s surname, our six-year-old asked me, “why are girls Miss if they aren’t married and Mrs. if they are and boys only have Mister.” Good. Question. And a reminder that we have a long way to go.

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7)  Have you seen Pantone’s color of the year!? My favorite shade of pink!!! (They actually chose two colors this year. The other one is Serenity, a soft blue.)

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8)  My husband and I attended a Krug champagne tasting dinner at the Yacht Club with two other couples. We found out at the last minute that it was a black tie affair, so I scrambled to buy a dress (and discovered Halston Heritage in the process. Oh my gosh).

The champagne was of course divine, but the food was….just okay. Well, the lobster was amazing, but I ate it in one bite. Same with the trout (although…three bites for that one). There  were healthy portions of duck and venison, but they were too gamey for some of us, and after dinner we drove to a local spot and shared a pizza.

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9)  Made blueberry scones (with the last of our summer blueberries from New York) for Christmas Day and two sweet potato pies for Christmas Eve. I had a mishap with the grater while making scones (P fetched a bandaid for me).

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10)  We only ate one of the pies on Christmas Eve, so I was able to take the other one to Shirley’s (our neighbor and my gardening friend) house the next day. When we got there, she presented the girls with their very own mini fairy garden. Sweetest. Thing. Ever.

In the spring we’ll put it outside, but right now it’s on our kitchen table. Our littlest plays with it every day.

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Just outside Will’s. Pantone color of the year?

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10)  My husband’s nephew works downtown at the new Will Leather Goods store and we finally made it down there to check it out. It’s a beautiful retail space, with most of the products on the main floor and a second floor loft houses their hats. There’s also a cafe inside the shop, which I didn’t try, but the treats looked yummy.

11)  Our book this month for book group was The Turner House, which I was interested to read because the story follows a family from Detroit throughout history. I couldn’t get more than halfway through. It was kind of blah.

Instead, I re-read the first Harry Potter book, which was just as fun the second time around. I spotted the new illustrated version later, and wished I’d read that version instead.

12)  This cheese. Whenever I see the Cypress Grove label, I get excited. One, because not many places carry it and two, their cheeses are fabulous. The company is located several hours north of San Francisco. I always wanted to visit, but never had the chance.

The Farms Market in town carries Purple Haze, which is a goat cheese (they’re all goat) with fennel pollen and lavender. I tried it for the first time this month (I usually get Humbolt Fog, which is divine with figs and pistachios) and it was equally great. So smooth. Just the right amount of lavender. (Also, can you tell I’m starving right now!?! )

December was a great month, but I did get pretty homesick this month for San Francisco, for friends, for family. Tis the season. I’m so looking forward to this New Year and all its possibilities. Wishing you a wonderful January and 2016!

That Time We Repainted the Living Room

Happy New Year!

December was a lazy month for me. I’ve been meaning to write this for weeks and am finally sitting down to do it. I wasted 15 minutes between typing the title and the first line by Googling “ab exercises, best haircut and slow cooker artichoke dip, but I think I’m good now.

When we moved in to the house in September of 2014, the living room looked like this….house.living house.living3

I hated the beige walls (too…muddy? too blah? Plus, does anyone like beige? These people, obviously. And the lady from Calico, who recently suggested maybe we paint our living room beige. Umm). So we added the living room to our to-be-painted list.

I wanted something clean, fresh, airy. Something white. I brought home dozens of white samples (you wouldn’t believe how many whites there are) from Benjamin Moore before they started charging for the 8 x 10 sheets (which I’ve no doubt I had something to do with) and even though several design bloggers (what do they know, anyway) said to stay away from Navajo White (a “dull, boring” white), I went with it.

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Old pic during remodel. Couldn’t find recent.

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The color definitely helped the room. But it still didn’t feel right. Was it airy? Sure. But now it was too airy. And plain (damn those design bloggers!). I realized the problem was that I was fighting with the room. I wanted it to be a Northern California room when it so clearly wanted to be Grosse Pointe. Okay, fine.

In January (we’d painted the room in October ’14), I wanted to repaint while the guys were here doing the kitchen and family room, but my husband wasn’t on board. In November, he all of a sudden wants to get curtains and gives me the go ahead for a repaint as well. Hurray!

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Deciding to go blue seemed the most logical choice. Our dining room was green, our kitchen, a gray-green, our hallway, a gray-tan (not beige!) and upstairs we have different variations of gray. Yellow was too….cheery and other colors like red or orange, too Victorian. I’d actually already selected a gray-blue, back when I thought we might be painting in January.

Of course me being me, I had to go through the process all over again. Back to Benjamin Moore, scouring the internet. I had visions of this….

Blue walls, pink chairs.:

to die for, right?

and this…Blue and Green: I picked up some paint samples, just to see. But painting it a deep blue, even though it would look beautiful and moody, would not really flow with the rest of the house. I tried to justify it in my head by saying that the room could be shut off with the double doors and therefore didn’t have to flow or that it was our house, we could paint it whatever we wanted, couldn’t we? But ultimately my dark blue fantasy room would have to wait.

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But the pink chairs would have looked so great with that deep blue. Sigh.

Another issue was our huge vintage poster. It has a striking blue background, so whatever blue we came up with would need to not clash with it, not match with it perfectly, not have too much green in it, etc. I was beginning  to realize that blue is a tough color to get right. As my mother-in-law stated, “it’s a commitment.”

For a day or two I toyed with the idea of a light blue (the Calico gal suggested that as well, to match the little blue flowers on the couch). And went back to the store for more samples. But a light blue living room made me think of an old lady’s house where you walk into the room and there are individually wrapped caramels sitting in a bowl. Just no.

I was going mental over it and my husband was done hearing about it. One evening, after begging him to deliberate with me once more, he rolled his eyes (okay I can’t say that with 100% certainty, but there is a high probability), threw his hands in the air (maybe) and said “well you love the dining room so much, why don’t you just paint it that color!” This ended the conversation and I was beyond annoyed. I mean beyond.

And yet.

I did love the dining room color. Nantucket Gray. The perfect green. Fresh but not too bright. Welcoming, but somewhat mysterious. My favorite color in the whole house. It would solve the problem of the blue painting and would certainly flow well with the rest of the house. Genius.

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I love it. The room feels much more inviting and looks tied together. I think once we get the curtains up (another harrowing decision oh my gosh! I’m so nervous about it), it will look even better.

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So that’s the story of how the living room got painted green.

The December List is up next. It’s snowing as I write this, but just a light dusting. We’re hoping for more this month (I mean, if it’s going to be cold, I’d rather it snow), but it’s been such a warm winter. Relatively speaking. Happy January!

Colonial Home in Fall

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I forgot to include this photo in my Fall post. I took this shot on a beautiful Fall morning in Grosse Pointe Farms. I love how the light seems to be singling out this home. And of course, mums in the entryway, flanking the door.